Well, few people will ever know the punch line, after the ASA slapped a ban on a flyer depicting the scene to drum up business for the sedate-sounding Beserk night at Club Fire in Ipswich.
In fantastically somb re tones the ASA declared the ad was irresponsible as it had caused
offence and ordered it to be removed
after a complaint by the Ipswich & Suffolk Council for Racial Equality on behalf of angry Poles and Catholics.
ASA said: "We noticed the deceased Pope (John Paul II) was depicted holding a bottle of beer and dancing with a young woman. However, we also noted the bottle of beer was not given particular prominence in the scene. We therefore considered its role in the relationship between the dancing figures was incidental, and it was unlikely to be seen as a contributory factor in any perceived sexual success."
The Power scores a bull's-eye
For those of you who didn't catch this online at offlicencenews.co.uk, here is Whyte & Mackay's cracker of an April Fool story. The whisky-maker claimed that darts
legend Phil "The Power" Taylor was battling head to head against David Beckham with his own fragrance range.
W&M Undeniable Power , the aftershaves were alle gedly whisky-infused.
By the looks of the inspired promotional poster, it looks like Miss British Isles stunner Nicola Moriarty just can't get enough of Phil's musk. And here at OLN, we don't know what to make of the fact that it was the third most read story on our site last week - either there's a lot of men out there looking for a new cologne or you all needed a laugh to counter the tough trading times.
Writing on wall for new Black?
Country cider fans have added
tasting notes to billboards advertising Blackthorn's new liquid.
The Evening News in Bristol reported that the £1.5 million relaunch of the Gaymers brand wasn't going down too well, with consumers likening it to Strongbow and saying it had lost its bite and familiar dry taste following
a recipe change and abv reduction.
Peter Spencer, managing director at Gaymers, said he was disappointed by the negative reaction but said "the majority of our customers prefer the new look and taste of Blackthorn and have very much welcomed the change". One Banksy-wannabe clearly begs to differ.
You have to hand it to Le Beast
chef Richard Corrigan has worked at "some very prestigious events", according to his fancy schmancy website, so we aren't quite sure how he took catering for a comedy puppet, sorry, ambassador extraordinaire, Le Beast. From the look on his face, Monsieur Beast looks rather lost for words too - is this
Fancy popping out for a 'vaping'?
It's hard to keep up with what the cool kids are saying at the best of times, but we think the Intellicig guys have taken it too far after trying to convince us that "vaping" is the new smoking. This new electronic cigarette, the PR assures us, is in fact a "vaping device".
After some detective work we think vaping refers to vapourised nicotine that can be inhaled at the same time as enjoying a realistic smoke-look. The Intellicig forum offers
impressive testimonials but sadly not one reformed smoker mentions anything about 'avin a vape.
What editors do for charity
Meanwhile, in angling news, fisherm en on the other side of the world have hit the headlines for catching a rare shark - and eating it.
But on these shores, the big stories were being made in Lechlade, Oxfordshire, when the trade gathered for the Benevolent's inaugural fly-fishing day.
An avid sea fisher, OLN editor Rosie Davenport is used to the small fish in a big pond scenario.
But it was definitely the other way around, when she managed to land this sizeable trout (a minnow in comparison to the 1.5 tonne White Pointer
our chief sub once allegedly caught, Ed). After an early morning start and a few mugs of tea, the six assembled teams got to work casting for their catch.
But it wasn't all about catching supper (though the hills are alive with the taste of rooibos-smoked trout alongside a chilled Voignier) - the event also netted £1,000 for the Benevolent.